The ABC's of Parenting
L is for the longing you feel when they are not there.
O, the obsession you have with them.
V represents the vital component that they are in your life.
E is the eternal bond ye share.
A shimmering spell is cast upon your world when you hear the initial newborn screech your baby makes having entered it. Any fears you may have been facing momentarily melt away. Any pain you felt is insignificant in comparison to the overwhelming joy and amazement. The anticipation to get started on your parenting is spurred on by a little courage and a big dream.
The love you already held for your partner grows when you share a child. Up until this point ye have shared dinners, trip, bills, and many memories, but none of those bind two people together as a child does. They are the glue. Hopefully the industrial strength kind, as opposed to the temporary stickiness of prittstick.
'Ever mine, ever thine, ever ours.' The words of Beethoven from the Letters to the Immortal Beloved perfectly depict the triad of life ye have created.
I have always been in love with the idea of love, and anyone who could express theirs in such beautiful words touched my soul. A card, for whatever the occasion may be, a birthday, Christmas, Valentines Day, and now Mothers Day, I save them. They hold more value for me than the frivolity of an expensive gift. They mean more than the pricey swipe of an ATM card at a store. I like to take them out from time to time, to re-read them. They instill faith and re-iterate the feelings that perhaps are not always visible on a daily basis. Like a little contract ;)
Even loves we no longer list as ours remain consequential to the people we are today. Every love impacts us whether minimally or fatally. Whether it be fleeting or sustained they teach us something. At the point of conclusion it may feel as though your heart will never heal, but there will come a moment of clarity, and it will be ok. You will be ok, and you will love once more. For it is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.
Not just for the elderly and infirm, the commode is a valuable asset when one cannot carry themselves to the restroom on their post-spinal tap Bambi legs. In such instances, it shall be brought to you. Dont get me wrong, its not the most pleasant of experiences, but when you gotta go, you gotta go. It of course means peeing into an open seated chair fundamentally, It seems so wrong on so many levels but when its your only option (it most certainly trumps a catheter) just swing your curtain round and pray no one pops their head around to check your incision.
An array of products came in the form of baby presents. 13 months later, we have not yet had the need to make any further purchases in this department. Johnsons really have cornered the market and our changing unit is like a reconstruction of a supermarket baby aisle.
The bedtime bath range genuinely does exactly what it says on the tin (bottle). Baby sleeps so much sounder after it. I bathe Rue every second night and on those nights she is calmer and cuddlier and more susceptible to the idea of slumber. The camomile shampoo smells so delicate and pretty on a freshly blowdried baby head.
My favourite though is the talcum powder. I probably use this more than Rascal. Post-shower, pre-jammies, I dose myself in it, especially my toesies (I hate damp feet) So a sock-full of lavender scented dust is perfection.
Never have I ever experienced anything like the heartburn I went through my second and third trimester with. The only solace I had in my darkest hour came in the form of Vanilla Haagen Dazs icecream (the large tub). My nightly fix came at a high price, and not just financially because it is not the cheapest on the market, but it quickly contributed to my monumental 4.5 stone weightgain. But it was more satisfying and productive than any medicinal treatment. Gaviscon was worthless to me. I was literally a dragon lady and it was imperative to my survival. Not even the year long battle to undo the extra cushioning I had provided myself with would make me regret the copious gallons of frozen delight.
I think the heartburn was indicative of the child Rue would become, and no, not a flame haired one as predicted by many, but a fiery munchkin with a sharp tongue and a burning stare. She was making herself known, making sure I didnt spend a moment without her on my mind, or in my oesophagus.
First came Dada, then Mama, but now it all seems to be about Nana. Rue crawls into the hall bellowing Nana. She will stand up against the door banging on it as if I'm harbouring her grandmother behind it. As endearing as it is, if your a tad sensitive like I can be, you tend to take it personally and wonder why you are not as appeasing.
Grandparents are a lifeline when you find yourself unable to parent as I was the past couple of months venturing in and out of hospital. Growing up I lived for the weekends as I spent most of them sleeping over at mine. With two younger sisters at home I found it tranquil. I had the tv to myself with an endless supply of chips and attention. I could sleep without being awoken by a baby and when I did wake up, it was alone in my own room. Perfection. As the original grandchild, I was a novelty and I thoroughly enjoyed my privileged stature.
Rue is the first grandaughter so there's a certain element of mystery about her. She has two cousins who she adores, but they have yet to figure her out. Shes a girl so shes not very cool. They are warming up to her though and their interaction is a joy to witness. As her 3 year old cousin said, 'shes's cute like me'. *swoon*